It was supposed to be our tenth.
Ten years of marriage. A vow renewal. A romantic getaway. Maybe even another round of “I do.”
But instead, it was just me.
No husband. No dinner reservations. No champagne.
Just a quiet morning, a heavy heart, and a decision:
I wasn’t going to mourn the date anymore.
I was going to transform it.
So I did something unexpected—maybe even a little wild.
I turned our would-be wedding anniversary into a healing retreat for women.
And in doing so, I found something far more meaningful than romance: I found purpose.
The Anniversary That Wasn’t
When my marriage ended, it wasn’t with screaming or scandal.
It was slow. Quiet. A thousand tiny cracks that finally gave way.
We separated the year before our tenth anniversary. And as that date approached, I could feel it looming like a storm cloud on the calendar.
I didn’t want to spend it crying.
I didn’t want to pretend it didn’t matter.
I wanted to reclaim it.
The Idea Came in the Shower
Literally.
Somewhere between shampoo and sobbing, it hit me:
“What if this day could mean something again—not for what I lost, but for what I could give?”
I thought about all the women I knew quietly healing:
The divorced. The heartbroken. The widowed. The exhausted. The women hanging on by a thread.
I sent out one message in a private group chat:
“Would anyone be interested in a one-day women’s retreat focused on healing, joy, and letting go?”
Within an hour, 18 women replied: YES.
What the Retreat Looked Like
It wasn’t fancy.
We rented a lakeside cabin. Brought yoga mats, journals, and way too much cheese.
There were candles, tears, laughter, and a “no judgment” rule that everyone obeyed.
We told our stories—not to compare pain, but to witness each other’s strength.
We wrote letters we didn’t send.
We burned old memories (safely!) in a fire pit.
We took deep breaths under the trees.
One woman whispered, “I haven’t felt this seen in years.”
That’s when I knew—I’d made the right choice.
What I Didn’t Expect
At one point during the day, someone asked, “What was this day supposed to be for you?”
I smiled. “It was my wedding anniversary.”
They all went quiet.
Then someone hugged me.
Another woman toasted me with a cup of herbal tea.
And for the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel sad about that date.
I felt… proud.
The Power of Repurposing Pain
It’s easy to let important dates haunt us.
Anniversaries. Birthdays. The “should have beens.”
But pain doesn’t get to own your calendar forever.
This retreat reminded me that healing doesn’t have to be quiet or lonely.
Sometimes, it can be shared.
Loud. Laughter-filled. Hopeful.
Where I Am Now
That retreat is now an annual thing.
Every year, on what used to be my wedding anniversary, I gather with a circle of women and we celebrate the things we’ve survived—and the lives we’re still building.
It’s no longer a sad day.
It’s my freedom day.
A reminder that even broken chapters can be rewritten with beauty.
What I’ve Learned
You can reclaim any date that once brought you pain.
Rewrite the meaning. You have that power.
Sisterhood is healing.
There’s nothing like women holding space for each other.
Purpose can grow from places where love once lived.
And sometimes, it blooms even brighter.
Final Thought
I turned our wedding anniversary into a healing retreat for women.
Not because I wanted to erase the past—but because I deserved a future that didn’t revolve around it.
And now, instead of mourning what was, I celebrate what is—
The strength of women.
The beauty of reinvention.
And the freedom of turning pain into purpose.
